My son is going to be 7 in about 2 weeks and lately (last 2 months) he has been an absolute nightmare to be around. He gets angry very easily at mundane things. I wake him at 7:15 every morning for school and the first thing i hear is "I'm still tired why did you wake my up again? I hate you!" He then demands that i let him have a poptart, if we are out of poptarts then he goes on a tirade about how I'm stupid and the worst mom in the world. He often tells me that he wishes he could live with his father because "him and K(daddys new girlfriend) give me what i want and they spoil me and buy me new toys and games all the time and never run out of poptarts, and K is a better mommy than you will ever be because you dont have any money to spoil me with. In the past 2 weeks he has brought my to tears with just the hurtful thing he's been saying. I dont understand what Im doing wrong. When he wanted to play football this past summer/fall I let him play. When wrestling started at the beginning of this month i sign him up for that as well. His father has taken my to court 3 times now trying to bar me from putting our son in sports. Yet once I pay for the sports and he starts playing my ex is right there eating up the glory of having a son part of the team. I wont give in to giving my child anything he wants when he wants it. If I do I'm not teaching him anything. When we go into any store be it the gas station or toys r us he demands that since dad gets him something there that i should too. Why should i buy him anything if I'm just getting gas in my car? I'm a single mom barely making $10 an hour and his dad make less than me but the new girlfriend is a nurse and has a lot of expendable income. Hence the spoiling. She told me before that when Im not around she's my sons mom! She's also told my son this as well. Back in july my son was given a spankin by his step-grandfather that left him with bruises. I took all the right steps and filed a police report and took him to the hospital, filed a report with the Childrens Service Agency and we were granted a civil stalking protection order which basically bars the step-grandfather with coming within 50 yards of my child. Since all of this has happened my son is also now terrified of grown men. My dad included which makes him more angry with me because when i go to work he somethimes has to go to my parents house. He's ok if its just my mom but if my dad is there or going to get off work and be there my son will flip out. When he finally is at my parents house and around my dad it takes a while for him to warm up but hes ok and sweet and playful and a joy to be around. His teacher tells my that he's one of the sweetest boys in her class and whenever i have to take him to my grandmas or a friends house or hire a sitter they all tell me that he is good as gold. The second I walk into a room he turns into this monster. Everyone notices the difference. My mom especially. She had him the one day and he was an angel, and then when they came up to my work my son instantly became moody, uncooperative, and mean. He wanted a pretzel and I told him no because he hadnt eaten supper yet. He kicked me called me an idiot and proceeded to throw himself on the ground in the middle of the mall and scream for 15 minutes that i sucked and he was starving and i never feed him. I refused to give in because 1 he hadnt had dinner and a pretzel isnt dinner and 2 a temper tantrum isnt going to get you your way sorry. I've tried to talk to his father about not giving him everything his heart desires. I've explained that if you give in to every thing a 6 year old demands you are teaching him to expect things handed to him. He needs to be taught that goodies and toys and tv time are earned and not a given. Both the behavior specialist and the trauma therapist say he is progressing nicely, but hes still calling me names and everything else. I also know that alot of this has to do with his father calling me these names in front of him. I have called his dad some names in front of my son while on the phone with him. I try not to but sometimes in the heat of the moment i slip. I've explaing to my son that those are things that I shouldn't say and that I was sorry. However from what my son has told me and how his dads girlfriend and mom both treat me (im the bad guy for going to the police and hospital after my son came home in bruises. They say im a snake because i didnt tell them i was going to the police and that im over reacting. His step-grandfather only hit him twice. The admitting e.r. doctor found at least 7 different hand prints where my son had been hit) they all tell my son that I'm the reason he's not allowed to see his "pap" Im keeping him away from them because I dont love my son and I dont want him to be happy. I don know what to do or how to rectify this situation. I should be looking forward to spending time with my son and watching him learn and loving every minute of it. Instead i find my self dreading conversations with a 6 year old! If you can help i would greatly greatly appreciate it!
