Spanking my stepsons in the right way

I am the stepfather of three boys: Mike, Lucas and Tim. Mike is 15, Lucas 13 and Tim 10. I married my wife ten months ago. They are wunderful boys most of the time, but sometimes they are misbehave and break our house rules in many ways, and this must come to an end. I discussed this subject with my wife, and we decided at least that I spank them in future if needed. But I’m very unsure how I should administer the spankings. Some questions for example: Which implements should I use? Maybe a paddle for all boys or is Tim too young to get paddled? Should I spank them bare bottomed?
I need advice.

Comments for
Spanking my stepsons in the right way

Jan 25, 2013 I doubt it
by: Bing

If ‘Bill’ is real, which I doubt, then obviously he does not have to worry about spanking his own off spring, because he won’t have any!

Jan 25, 2013 Re: “Use the belt” By Bill
by: Anonymous

“Use the belt
by: Bill”

Well Bill, all I can glean from this piece of literary ineptitude is that you are probably a Paedophile, but a particularly dangerous one at that.

God save our children from preditors such as you, and may the law catch up with you quickly.

Jan 24, 2013 Use the belt
by: Bill

I’d saying spanking them bare with a belt would be the right thing to do. I was always whipped naked, usually about 20-30 smacks on my butt and 5-10 on my penis. That really got my attention when I needed it. If you do it hard enough and it hurts pretty soon you won’t need to do it!.

Jan 01, 2013 am the psychologist just posted
by: Anonymous

In answer to the abuser of children who asks how many children “any psychologist” has raised, well my wife and I have raised two boys and one girl.

They were all raised with a method of reward and example and they have grown up well adjusted, without fear of a father being overbearing.

They will no doubt raise their children the same way (if they are Heterosexual and choose to have children).

I disagree that the lack of Corporal punishment in schools has led to lack of discipline and respect for all kids, for my kids don’t fit that bill. Liberalism has caused the breakdown of respect, not beating children.It is our fault that kids fail in school, not theirs, and it is wrong to blame them for it.

Jan 01, 2013 Please seek medical assistance friend
by: Anonymous

Spanking is not abuse
by: Anonymous

The psychotic drivel your spout is all the usual garbage given when an abuser is caught and taken to the courts.

You can pontificate all you want about beating a defenceless child with a weapon, and how correct you are as the previous millenia have proven, but all this rubbish was given as reasons to burn witches too.

You can try to cast doubt on the science of psychology too, but I assure you that all you are doing is making a public display of the psychosis you may be harbouring.

Before you either beat any more children or advise others on its benefits please make an appointment with a psychiatrist and see what he or she has to say about your possible illness.

Dec 31, 2012 Spanking is not abuse
by: Anonymous

Psychology is an opinion, not physical or medical fact. Sociologists tend to conduct bogus studies, designed with leading questionnaires and aimed at specific demographics to prove their pre-conceived personal biases.

Spanking an adolescent’s bare butt was a time-tested and validated method of applying serious correction when that young person disobeyed. Without a strong and unpleasant consequence, little can be done to aid human learning.

Life doesn’t allow us to fail without a consequence, and disobedience to a parent or guardian needs to be addressed with strong enough consequences that the young person learns from the experience and does not desire to repeat either the bad actions or the spanking that resulted.

To accuse spanking of being child abuse is to willfully and intentionally deny the hundreds of years of successful child-rearing that employed spanking. Since the advent of false negative statements regarding corporal punishment, schools have become more violent, students manifest lest respect for any type of authority, and the overall level of juvenile crimes against property and persons has dramatically risen.

Perhaps it is time to stop listening to theories about alternate methods of raising kids…..theories both untested and unvalidated…..and expounded by people who either have never raised children or have failed in their own family efforts — and now wish to experiment on other families. Just ask the next Psychologist who claims spanking is bad and wrong, how many successful kids they have raised themselves. Their answer should prove my assertions.

Dec 17, 2012 Paddle is fine for all
by: Anonymous

“Paddle is Fine for all
by: Anonymous”

You are sick, like a lot of the posters on this site.

How can ANY of you pretend to love their kids and yet beat the **** outa them. I tell you what, I’d like to see you do it whilst I was there, I’d punch you on the nose.

Poor kids unable to protect themselves from marauding parents pretending to have their best interests at heart!.

You need locking up…******* perverts!

Dec 15, 2012 Abuse ?
by: Anonymous

RE: Abuse…? Definitely not.
by: Anonymous

Beating a child is humiliating and unnecessary, and no matter what you say IS abuse.

I have almost forty six years as a psychologist and can assure you abuse is abuse.Violence perpetuates violence and the cycle must be broken by alternative ways to “correct” childrens misdemeanours.

There is no evidence whatsoever that these alternative methods are retrograde to any degree,quite contrarily these methods have been adopted by more enlightened society for more than a decade.

For an adult to resort to violence ( which is what we are talking about) it is evidence of a breakdown in the parental skill, and worse still gives opportunity for perverts to live out their fantasy on the innocent body of a defenceless child (of which I was one).

It seems that America has a long way to go before it catches up with the civilised world as far as its definitions child abuse is concerned.

Dec 13, 2012 Abuse…? Definitely not.
by: Anonymous

I also work with children (30+ years as a marital and family counselor), and I can say with certainty that corporal punishment administered in a calm and controlled manner is not abuse.

Conversely, any type of punishment (spanking, time-out, grounding, etc.) given in the heat of the moment out of the parent’s own anger or frustration is damaging to children!.

Dec 12, 2012 “Be their friend”
by: Anonymous

Well, all I can say is that we have a lot of child abusers here on this site.

You are obviously all American, and brought up by / continue to pass on your violence.

Here in the UK children are protected from such people, and they are arrested if caught abusing children as you seem to all wish to do.

My work is with children, and ive never heard of such “legal” abuse… in the “Land of the Free” !

I wont be posting again, I want to vomit.

Dec 11, 2012 Re: To “seems legit”
by: Anonymous

Absolutely the WORST thing any parent or step-parent can do for a child is try to be their “friend”.

Punishment is a small but essential part of parenting, and spanking is one valid and effective method of punishment for children of all ages!.

Dec 10, 2012 The way my parents did
by: Anonymous

My mom used a paddle and dad used a belt. From the time I was 8 years old on, all of my spankings were administered bare-bottomed.

Both parents continued to spank me until I was finished with college and about to get married.

For stepsons of these ages I would definitely say use either a paddle or belt, not your hand, and spank bare-bottom. As long as you punish calmly they will learn from it and not have any problems at all from being spanked.

Dec 10, 2012 to “Seems Legit”
by: Anonymous

Legit? Are you insane? Don’t you think the writer has at the very least a screw loose by naming his step sons and inviting all and sundry to offer advice on how to torture the kids?

If he needs advice then I suggest he develops a (non violent) relationship with these boys and gives them an example to follow and admire. They already have lost their real father and there’s no way he can take his place, but can try to be a friend to the boys.

Punishments should be things like grounding, losing of perks and pleasurable past times like TV, games, pocket money etc.

Putting their names on here for all and sundry to drool over and offer suggestions how to hurt those kids is shameful.

If this guy treats the boys as I have said then maybe, just maybe he may be fortunate enough to be trusted by those kids, and bring some joy into each others lives.

Dec 10, 2012 The expression “Faggot”
by: Anonymous

To Anonymous who says “Seems Legit”

What is it with you Americans that use this term “Faggot” ?

You will one day be ruled with equalities legislation and rightfully prosecuted for such language my friend.

You call people “Faggots” whilst admitting that you beat your kids with a weapon… youve got your priorities all wrong mate. You need to grow up and realise that Homosexual people have the right to be protected from people like you who use this vile language.

God Bless America huh ?…. yeah sure.

Dec 09, 2012 Its wrong to hit kids
by: Colin

I was smacked by a school teacher when I was 8, caned by a teacher when I was 11 and caned by a teacher when I was 14. ALL three times I was INNOCENT ! I couldnt defend myself because I was never belived. I am 65 now and can tell you that these punishments destroyed my life utterly.

As far as i’m concerned any adult that hits a child, or worse still uses a WEAPON on a child should have their hands cut off.

Beating children is cowardly, unnecessary and an indication of parental failure to bring up a child properly without resorting to violence.

Police SHOULD be called to a parent that does this because the child has rights too, and cannot defend his or herself.

There’s NO right way to spank your stepsons, they are not your children and clearly you have no love for them and this is a kink for you.

You need locking up, and I hope the oldest boy punches you on your nose!.

Oct 29, 2012 Seems Legit
by: Anonymous

This seems like a legitimate request for suggestions to me, not made up. Lots of guys struggle with this question, especially those of us who were whipped pretty regularly.

Oct 07, 2012 wow
by: kc

Wow u people are sick making a teen be completely bare for a spanking give me a break most of you get off on reading this stuff and make up ficticious bs.

I have two boys I would never spank them bare I use the paddle but always over my knee and always on there jeans don’t give suggestions to a person when you are just a lonely faggot who gets off on spanking kids bare

Sep 25, 2012 Gratitude to commentators
by: Barnaby

I am delighted to have read the fine and relevant comments made recently by: “USMCRetiredE-8;Jur” & “Rodney”, relating to the spanking of adult/older sons. It is comments like these which elevate this ‘Parenting Advice’ above anything which similar Forums ATTEMPT to offer.

Sep 24, 2012 It makes no sense
by: Ursula

Jon sadly misses the plot, he spanks his son of 14 for smoking. So what, many Dad and Mums spank their boys.

No details are provided, no pointing out the benefits of the spanking. Its a bit like saying my daughter likes chips for dinner, because she is hungry.

In the context of parental advise this is nonsense and so is what Jon says.

Sep 23, 2012 spank
by: jon

my son is often spank with belt he 14 he get spank for smoking!.

Sep 20, 2012 I agree…………….
by: Rodney

I agree with Justa, if a dad spanks his strapping well developed male child at 19, that man acts scandalously off bounds.

Why? he is dealing with a man. Now this perpetuates itself. The very language Alex, the CREATED culprit uses denotes that he sees his sons of 14 and 17 as objects hardly as children and I quote Alex: (‘and doesn’t hesitate to use the very same discipline methods with his two sons, 17 and 14 y.o.’).

That language indicates the remotes his feels towards his poor children, one, who could almost be a father and the other already advanced in puberty both with a right to privacy.
Here they can stand naked and trembling before a father, who, lips pursed spanks their individuality away!.

Sep 20, 2012 WTF!!
by: USMCRetiredE-8

WTF is wrong with the majority of you people?? I have to agree with Texas Dad and Justa. Alex you were at 18 and 19 and are now a massive puss, to come on a forum where real parents are asking for advise and write that BS about being spanked by your Dad as an adult, what total fiction!.

I joined the Marine Corps at 17, when I was 15 or 16 I would have fist fought my real Dad before I would have bent over and taken a spanking of any kind because I would have rather been punched than spanked.

I never had a Step-Dad when I was growing up, but my Mom had lots of boyfriends and I took several beatings from them over the years, until one hit me when I was 15, and was stupid enough to lay back down on the couch to watch the end of a basket ball game. I caught him off guard and beat him silly with my baseball bat, funny he broke up with my Mom on the phone the next day, and he never came back to our house.

I have two grown sons, two grown daughters, and seven grandchildren. If a stranger (step-dad or boyfriend) ever touch any of my babies in the ways that so many anonymous writers have suggest on here, I would make that person disappear.

I’m going to take just a moment to address the person who began this discuss, by asking for advise. Most of the people posting to your request for advise are liars, It should be obvious to you because most of the liars posted as anonymous.

My advise to you is don’t hit other peoples children, and don’t try to spank any child, yours or not, that is pass an appropriate age for spanking. 13 or 14 is pushing it, any older than 14 is just stupid!.

Sep 20, 2012 This is silly
by: Justa

Alex to have had your old man spank you at 19 bare bum is plain silly. Now you do the same to your hapless sons. It does not amaze me that you have a good relationship with your father since this probably is because he still controls you with his bank balance.

Sep 04, 2012 I was spanked and I spank
by: alex

My father spanked me till I was 19, very rarely (I might have deserved more of it, being rather disobedient child) and without causing any injuries, of course. The meaning of punishment was not to hurt me but to make me understand how deeply he was disappointed by my behavior and that he expected me not to repeat the same mistake (which I usually didn’t). Few slaps with hand or belt (never more than a dozen) on my bare bottom would really make me behave for some time, more for a shame I felt (for letting down my father and, sure, for being half naked in front of him and treated like a little kid) than for the pain the spanking or belting itself caused. I’m a successful man today who has a marvelous relationship with his father and doesn’t hesitate to use the very same discipline methods with his two sons, 17 and 14 y.o. My wife was initially against spanking, but she has changed her mind witnessing the most gratifying bond between us and our children.

Aug 13, 2012 Loving correction
by: bertha

I agree that all boys need a loving correction. But in order to get the message home, it is best to spank boys up 16 bare bum.

Aug 07, 2012 One is as good as the other
by: Flip

My stepson of 11 is spanked like my other boys 9 and 14. All get it bare butt. But I am careful not too spank to hard. It is done to make a correction, not to cause damage.

Aug 07, 2012 One is as good as the other
by: Flip

My stepson of 11 is spanked like my other boys 9 and 14. All get it bare butt. But I am careful not too spank to hard. It is done to make a correction, not to cause damage.

Jul 23, 2012 Are you all on Crack??
by: Texas Dad

Are you all on crack or is this a spanking sex site?? In what world does a new Step Dad come in to a family and spank a 15 year old, or even a 13 year old and 10 year old who you haven’t been a part of raising for a year yet. I raised four sons, mine, and I only spanked one of them past 13 years old, my second son when he was 14, one incident when he got cocky and bowed up because he thought he was a “man”
I spanked all my Son’s through out their younger year and it was the punishment of choice because it works and it whiffed justice that little boys understand, but to use spanking as a punishment for young men who are 3 or 4 years from being adults is showing a lack of talent as a parent and not preparing them for the real world.
I saw a suggestion that this Step Dad of 10 months spank these three children on the bare butt, who are you freaks? Would you really allow a child you love to be forced to bare them selves to a person who was a stranger a few years ago? Where are these boys Father, Grandparents, Uncles and Aunts?? If my boys had been spanked on the bare butt at any age by a person they barely knew with out my approval or knowledge I would have taken action to ensure that it would never happen again, period, so you best be a bad ass mo-fo my friend because most families take the welfare of their children very serious.
My true suggestion to you as a Father and Grandfather who is a real person and parent, and not a sex-spanking freak is to be what your are, your new wife’s lover and support. If she can’t correct her own children then she should bring their Father into the mix, or one of their Grandfathers, or one of their Uncle not you. If you. If had been in their life’s since they were small, and the family agreed, it would be different the boys would accept you in that role, but at their ages they will come to hate you, and things will get bad fast. Don’t listen to the freaks that are filling your heads with bs because if you think it through you’ll realize I’m telling you the truth.

Jul 11, 2012 Spanking is not the option
by: Childlover453

Oh spanking is too disgusting . How can someone beat his own child this will make them become scared of their parents. Punisment like Confiscating their favorite toy or game is more effective!!

Jun 17, 2012 Mother` hairbrush
by: Lori

My mother used the hairbrush on my naked bottom when I misbehaved and that always helped, at least for some weeks or months. I noticed that she speeded down when I started to cry after 25 – 30 swats.
The normal position was over her lap, the hairbrush and hand on bare bottom. My brother got the same punishment by our father. I am grateful for the strict upbringing our parents gave us and the fact that our spanking always took place in our bedrooms.
Sometimes I listened to my brothers spanking and as far I can remember he got the same doze.

Jun 16, 2012 Not real…fortunately
by: Anonymous

I’m pretty sure this is made up and I am glad if that is the case. Its a pretty frightening post.

However, the subject of step parents spanking or disciplining children is an important one. All children require discipline and what works for one may not work for another. Some kids get through their childhood with virtually no trouble. Others, worry their parents sick that they will end up in prison.

I raised my sons after I divorced my husband and there were just a few times I really felt I had to discipline by spanking. I felt that it was my responsibility and not my new husband’s job to do it. Although, I always asked for and got his input. I also allowed him to be present when I spanked and I appreciated his moral support. It also let my sons know that their step dad was standing by me.

Ordinarily, I don’t think a parent should spank with an object. A hand is generally enough. I don’t think kids should be spanked on their bare bottom. However, I usually did take down their pants and spank them in their underwear. That, alone, usually shook them up pretty good. The only exception to the rule about objects would be if you have a weak hand or are afraid it would be easily injured. In that case, I could see a parent–carefully–using a belt or maybe the back of a hairbrush.

Spanking is rarely called for. But that’s how it ought to be done in a household with step parents.

May 29, 2012 Good long bare bottom spankings worked for this stepson
by: Scott

Nothing is more effective to teach discipline than bare bottom spanking over the lap for your step sons. I was 11 when my mom married my stepdad Steve and a couple months of me misbehaving before he convinced her that I NEEDED a bare bottom spanking exactly like he & his brothers got growing up.

The first time I was in a bunch of trouble, he grabbed me by the collar of my down jacket marched me out to the garage, sat on an old sofa out there & told me to pull down my jeans. I was trembling. He helped me over his lap, pulled my feet up so I was prone & peeled down my shorts and slid up my jacket. He said that he needed to spank me on the bare bottom to make sure it was safe and effective, and told me to relax my bottom, lay still & take my medicine, even when it really, hurt. Then he locked his arm around my waist & spanked.

I thought it would be just a few quick smacks, but it was LONG, one cheek then the other back & forth like a machine, long and steady.. After a few minutes I was wiggling and about to bawl, it really stung, but his arm was around my waist so I couldn’t move.

He stopped, told me that he got plenty of spankings just like I got, that it was quick justice & cleared the air, nothing else worked, & we would both feel better after.

I started to get up but he stopped & said it wasn’t over. He asked what lesson I had learned & what would happen next time I was misbehaved. He said he needed to make sure I’d remember the lesson for a long time, especially when I sat down for a while.

I had to scoot up, he adjusted my shorts and jacket and administered a series of dozens really hard, really fast spanks. I was bawling after the first dozen, apologizing during the second dozen but he kept going. My bottom was burning so much, then he stopped and helped me to my feet, crying & rubbing my sore butt.

As I pulled up my pants, he told me to take a few minutes, get myself together, then go back in the house, that it was over. He left the garage & I kept crying & rubbing. My little brother started getting spanked months later.

For me, a spanking did clear the air, and tension in the house. Grounding and nagging and extra chores seemed to drag on forever. Most of my friends got spanked so it wasn’t any big deal.

I got spanked a few times at 12, & more at 13. I was defiant & pushed limits. At 13, most my friends were getting it less or pants up and with a paddle, Steve said that a paddle could be dangerous or not hurt, & if I didn’t want a spanking like a naughty boy not to be one.

Going out when grounded & lying were guaranteed spankings in our house. I got it at 14 for things like throwing snowballs at the school bus & shooting at my brother’s friend’s with a bb gun. My last spanking was at almost 16 for shoplifting at the mall. my butt was so red, but it was better than getting arrested.

Bare bottom spankings taught me respect for myself, parents and others & will for your stepsons too

May 15, 2012 spank them hard
by: Anonymous

i am a teacher and a single mother of a 12 yrs.most of the times he behaves well but when he does something wrong knowingly things get worst for him. like last week i told him several times to prepare his lessons for the class test held on the very next day but he didn’t & got very poor marks.which made really angry & he got a unforgettable spanking session.i pulled of his pant then took a wooden ruler took him over my lap and spanked him so hardly until his bottoms got enough red.after 20 or 25 hard strokes i took a very good care of his upper thighs.after making them red too i made him stand in the balcony ( of course without any dress!)by holding his ears for 1 hour.when he misbehaved in public i just tell him ” do you really want me to pull off your clothes and to burn your buttocks?”this sentence really works for me and when i spanked him(not very his 7 twice or thrice in a week, in 10 twice in a month and now he gets once in a month)i make sure that it gonna be an unforgettable that when he tries to do something wrong i just take that ruler and roll my eyes and he imagines his next 2-3 horrible hours and suddenly becomes a well behaved boy. when he was 8 he lied to me and i spanked him by a leather strap on bare butts in front of his 2 friends and told them to twist his ears so hardly which they did.after that he never lied to me.

Feb 19, 2012 father of 3 boys 10, 9, and 6
by: Anonymous

my boys are total naked when i spank them.
adds to the punishment, like 2 punishments in one.

Feb 19, 2012 i spank my 3 boys, joey::11, brady::10, and jonnathan 7
by: Anonymous

i always take spank my boys total naked, it can be a part of safety as well, with no pants or underpants around ankles they can’t trip and fall on their way to the corner.

Feb 18, 2012 the need for loving correction
by: Man from NC in USA

Spanking is a tool in a parent’s or step parent’s hands. Different people have differing views on the topic. I feel that the consistent theme throughout this discussion is “loving correction.” Perhaps the answer lies between strict and lenient. If one is too strict, then the boy will not grow beyond the control of the parent. If one is too lenient, then the boy will simply be out of control. I have heard some boys complain that they get spanked “for every little thing.” That is too much control. I have also seen boys out of control. This is too little control. Don’t “punish” him, rather, give him loving correction in a balanced approach that allows him to grow within the proper limits. Each boy is unique, so tailor the loving correction to meet his needs.

Feb 10, 2012 a proper spanking
by: Anonymous

Take them across your knee lower trousers to there ankles and tan then over there briefs

Feb 07, 2012 Sad to say…….
by: Fransy

Indeed, what anonymous does is not address the issue ‘dealing with stepsons.’
What I found heart breakingly sad as a mother of 3 children; (who left a cruel heartless husband who also brutalised them and me.He also dominated their lives ‘my way is the only way!’)Is the fact that he is oblivious to what he has done to his off spring.’ At least my husband now is remorseful, but the children now grown up will not let them come near them or near his grand children- they got more sense then the children of anonymous.
Whipping children the way anonymous did is the way bullock drivers treated their beasts-no father worthy of the name would ever do this to lovely young children.

Feb 02, 2012 Puppet Theatre
by: Rodney

Anonymos gives me the shivers. What a punishment for Anonymous, to have reared 5 puppets. Even now they are to afraid to tell him the truth.
When at home he ruled them with vicious and brutal spankings and deprevations no doubt.
Now he rules them probably with providing mortage payments and handouts, so that they are still bound by him.
In return for this he no doubt has acquired the right to choose puppet wifes for his 5 (ever thanking)puppet boys. Also he reserves the right to watch gleefully when the sons bash their boys and even lends a hand to spank their bare boy bums. After all ‘Im the puppeteer.
One day it may dawn on him that his offspring loathe him, despite their servitude!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jan 29, 2012 I must have it wrong
by: Ernest

I must have it wrong, I thought the question was about step sons and spanking. Now it’s about what a whip can do to make 5 bio sons so robotically submissive that they thank the whipper every day no less.

Dec 24, 2011 A whipping is a good thing…
by: Anonymous

You are doing the right thing. I raised five boys. They are now all college graduates, professionals, fine upstanding citizens, and decent young men. I was very strict. Whenever they were disrespectful, disobedient, or dishonest in any way, they got a trip to the woodshed and a good old-fashioned whipping on the bare bottom with my leather belt. I was very involved in their lives, i.e. coached their ball teams, helped them with homework, active in Boy Scouts, took them on hunting and fishing trips, taught them how to do projects and chores around the farm, took them to the barber shop every two weeks (kept them in short burr haircuts), etc. They were raised up right. And, now that they are grown, they thank me every day for keeping them on track. What most of the boys today actually need, is a good old-fashioned whipping.

Oct 13, 2011 All’s well that ends well….
by: Raymond

It is heartening to see a stepson like Stuart tell nice things about his stepdad. It is often so unrewarding to be in position to raise stepkids with love-how many sighs and tears have we all shed. Al of us know that we strive the best for these children. If a bit of corrective smacking bring peace/harmony/love about, that’s gain. I actually think-while not damning others, that corrections should be taking place when the child is covered modestly. Bare bum is most likely not a good idea-but if this must be done-then without severe humiliation-by the dad only with boys, and only just a few mild smacks. Never should the child be spanked hard. In fact physical corection should be avoided where possible. Grounding, deprevation of some pleasures/taking away computer games etc. sometimes works often well. Seek for a reward, there and is none greater then bestowed on a loving father by a child who responds in love to the caring correction of the stepdad. Personally I rarely spank and then so mildly and have received a reward also in love of 2 of these fab. stepsons 12 and 14-who I also love like crazy as much at least as my bio son and 2 daughters.Love your kids !

Oct 10, 2011 Is this for real?
by: Anonymous

Do you people honestly think it’s okay to delight in the talk of spanking and humiliating children? It isn’t okay. Do you really think the more humiliating and painful it is, the more the children will comply? You are creating a dangerous situation. All your doing is teaching those kids is not to get caught and you are possibly raising future sex offenders. THINK!!

It takes a REAL MAN to discipline without inflicting pain and humiliation. It is easier to spank than to follow through with a REAL and more effective consequence in the long run. Teach children to make good choices and decisions….not violence!


Oct 10, 2011 Happy
by: Stuart

I am 17 now and a stepson, I still live with my mum and stepdad my dad?s has 2 daughters from a previous marriage. I am no longer spanked because I have work and live in a little unit attached to the house. But up to 16 stepdad used to spank and paddle me. My mum married him when I was nearly 14. But real dad did not care for me I had to move in with mum. My stepdad tried to be friendly but I did not like him. My mum always said he provides for you and gives you generous pocket money, well so what? Mum said I was a handful. I ignored the home rules.One day he said boy I will deal with you unless you are better behaved. One day I came home late he waited for me, told me to shower and then come to his study room he told. I said, Oh please I won?t be late again give me a chance. He hand spanked me hard. I hated him. When finished he said you took that well. I said I hate you! He said boy I did it because I like you and want you to be better kid, I saw a look of real sorrow on his face-I cried and melted in his arms. Now I adore my dad.

Oct 10, 2011 If only
by: Lliley

I too have 3 stepkids-2 daughters and 2 boys.
No problems with the girls, but the boys drive me up the wall. I wished I had a guy like Simon around (my guy)just ignores the kids behaviour, at any rate he is most of the time at sea, being in the Navy.
The boys 11 and 14 show no respect. And with the man away I find it hard to cope, they swear and steal whenever they can. The only way I have been able to dicipline the 11 year old is to surprise him in the bath tub. He gets it then with a cloth brush on his rear and thighs. Then he remains bare till he goes to bed. Slowly I’m taming him. The 14 year ol is too smart and strong for me. All I can do is take away is computer games, but then he goe to his friend’place

Oct 06, 2011 Solving a hard problem
by: Simon

Good luck with your 3 wunderful stepkids. The advice/examples by others no mention is made of the reluctant,fighting monsters that some stepfathers inherit when they marry the mum of the darlings. My teen stepboys nearly wrecked the marriage. I wanted to deal with them but my wife constantly screamed at me. The only thing that saved me was getting rid of the 17 year old leader–disciplinning him,what a joke, no chance, mights well discipline King Kong. He was stronger then me.Luckily my wife agreed at last to have him get out, he now lives on a farm, fighting the cows and pigs.
The other boys 13 and 15 also were threatened of the heave-ho, I also threatend to leave my wife, then everything suddenly improved.
My wife instead of protecting the boys actively encouraged discipline. Spanking has improved the kids so much that I too can say, yes they are almost wonderful.(I’m talking 10 years ago).Sadly at first I spanked in anger, this left the boys-my wife and self miserable before,during and after the spanking. Soon after I changed and spanked them with care, realising that they were my nice wife’s kids and like all boys could be very nice, charming immature humans. Later I spanked them with love and understanding and I became the dad they needed and love and hug but never had before.
My spanking method remained firm.
Inital spanking over the knee,wearing undies and short T shirt, moderately hard by hand.
Depending on the nature of the offence, further spanking if considered good, completely bare and spanked while bend-over. With stealing persistent/disobedience, always on the table in diaper position with foreskin retracted-this was an obdeiance things between dad and his boys.
They now have all left home,but we maintain in a loving relationship.

Sep 28, 2011 Don’t overdo it 
by: Rick

I think Hank got it right most of the way, but why spank your lovely boys on the tender anus and why should you supervise their showering? My boy is spanked completely bare, but never too hard. I have only got 1 stepson he is 13, but I love him and he loves me. He only gets a mild hand spanking just too get the message, don’t muck around buddy! We are great friends and the spanking always seals ourn friendship and forgivenes.

Sep 26, 2011 Love your boys
by: Mike

I think also that it is great to be stepdad of 3 wonderful young boys. Yes most of the recommendations are fine, but I still think there are too many hang-ups.
I have 2 stepsons 12 and 15 and they get spanked, but not before they have a supervised shower, I hate to spank dirty boys. After there shower they get spanked in the birthday suit. I only use my hands, never spank too hard or too long.
Every spanking is different, sometimes the kids get spanked over the knee, at other times hands on knees and bum up or hands grabbing the heels of their feet?this stretches the boy bum really well and prevents clenching. For real bad things the boys without having to tell them, go on a low table in the diaper position, they must be fully back tilted and arms crooked under the knees to stay in position. When I ask have you forgotten anything they promptly pull back their foreskins. This means that the boys are actively involved in the spanking. Yes it is humiliating but the boys do it willingly because they both love me and always hug and kiss when all is over. Like the Dad of the 3 boys my boys are wonderful.

Sep 22, 2011 Care for the kids needs
by: Hamus

How, refreshing a stepdad of 3: Mike 15, Lucas 13 & Tim 10, calls them wonderful boys! But sometimes they cause mischief.
Correspondents provided good advice, but there are different ways, to deal with differing circumstances when disciplining. If a natural father exists, and has no objection to your discipline, plan with their mum the form of discipline best suiting circumstances, this depends how the children view stepdad. Has he built up rapport with them so they trust him? Do the boys hug and the younger ones (and maybe the older boy) kiss him, as they would a dad? Does he take the kids to sport and is part of their lives. As happens in normal loving households do Tim 10 and Lucas 13 feel safe if dad walks into the bathroom, when they are bathing. Does mum feel the boys love him? Imagine how the boys feel when baring their bottoms that strange man beats the-crap-out-of-them, these questions need to be answered. Discipline should never be at the expense of children, but benefit them. With trust lacking, discipline should not involve bare spankings. My family with teen boys 13 and 14, know the rules, caught in serious mischief its pants down. The family here have no rules. Bare spanking is a son and dad thing , well brought up, most are not ashamed of dad seeing them bare, they are ashamed to be treated like little kids. Some teen boys have hang-ups about modesty negotiation is always possible -what they fear most is spanking pain.
Sit down with the kids honestly discuss disciplining rules. Changes must take place mum and dad will no longer put up with breaking the rules. Some recommendations aired in the forum relating to discipline can be brought up. I liked ?a loving correction? a father gives his 3 sons, 2 of them stepsons, a choice all privileges/ outings cancelled for a week or hands on knees and pants down for a hand spanking. Once the boys agree they deserve punishments for bad actions including bare butt spanking, the meeting is over.
When the boys behave poorly, the action starts. A choice is given spanking as you see fit or privileges cancelled, (it is best not to spank little Tim bare at this stage- spank him in tight fitting undies).
I learned from the forum that various forms of discipline can be good for variation. No matter how hard I tried my kids would not lie down in the diaper position, but I tried the method of, after the hand spanking to use a wooden spoon to inflict soreness on the inner cheeks, thighs and anus with great success, did our boys jump!

Sep 18, 2011 I spank with love
by: Anonymous

As a father to 3 boys: Robby 8, Hank 10, and Johan 13, they are my responsibility when it comes to discipline, (the wife disciplines our daughters). Many parents in your site spank children, no doubt with good intentions, partially or totally bare-this is their business. But I feel it?s better to have boys? private areas including their bottoms, covered when spanking. Clearly nudity while spanking, leaves children, too vulnerable and helpless. It is like saying: now you mucked up so now I deprive you even of your right of privacy to your own body and obey me without question! This is not to say that I would shun seeing my boys unclothed-like I wash my 8 and 10 year old boys regularly, which they enjoy. But my 13 year old is a very delicate and sensitive kid, who is fine when I chance on him while dressing or undressing. But he would be in total anguish if his dad, who he loves so much, would deprive him of his right to modesty. So our spanking goes like this: The naughty boy is in undies or pyjamas and gets a thorough hand spanking-never more than 10 spanks. He screams just as much and his tears are as real as a child spanked in the nude. But his privacy is not violated-this creates a real respect between father and sons.

Sep 14, 2011 A loving correction
by: Anonymous

I have 2 stepsons:Frankie 9,John 11 and my natural son, Tobey16.All are loved and treated equally. They are fabulous lads. But when they step- out -of line, they choose from 2 options : have all privileges and outings cancelled for a week or the more painful spanking. Invariably, they go for the spanking. That is always done with the kid wearing just a long T shirt to cover genitalia; they are very modest. Punishment commences with a hand spanking -bend over with hands on knees and legs splayed wide-open. The T- shirt is lifted and the bum and inner cheeks spanked until bright red. Then he gets a 10 minute break, even have a soft drink. Now the boy climbs on the fully height adjustable table and settles down in the diaper position. A small wooden porridge spoon is now applied with moderate force to the more intimate and sensitive crack and anus areas, which are reddened suitably. Even the 16 year old while well developed, is still a real boy in every way and complies willingly.

The end result is a forgiven boy who, while crying and snottering knows that the slate is clear, hugs and kisses follow, always.

Sep 08, 2011 spanking my 2 lads
by: Anonymous

Iam a father of 2 young boys, one 10 the other one 13. Both are mostly well behaved.
When they deserve a spanking, like for lying or swearing, they get spanked while wearing under pants, which they obediently pull into their bum cracks. They are very shy boys and bare bottom spanking is something they hate.
I do also, spank their upper thighs and they have to pull up their undies so that the very tender upper groin areas are exposed.

They always kiss me after the spanking and I love them both dearly and just need to teach them right from wrong. TURTLE

Aug 05, 2011 Spanking to correct behaviousr
by: Anonymous

I have 3 boys also in aged 8,12 and 14.

They are fine lads but at times, like all boys,

I spank them on the advice of a family friend in the diaper position with foreskin retracted for extra humiliation.

Also they have to pull theit bum cheeks wide open when I ask them to, so that I can treat their soft inner cheeks and anus with painful spanks.

This method has meant that the kids behave much better then in the past. COBAL T

Aug 01, 2011 paddle them hard
by: Ryan

I have 4 boys 9,11,13 and 15. I use a solid polished wood hairbrush which is very effective on young boys bare bottoms (I got same myself their ages). Best way is naked over lap, legs pineed by yours and arm held behind his back. I can assure you that if you are prepared to vigorously paddle their bare bottoms for about 3 mins for the yongest and up to around 10 mins for oldest you will see vast improvement. They will howl and bawl but thats normal. Also spank them in front of one another its more effective. Dont hold back and good luck

Jul 29, 2011 Spanking your stepsons
by: jeremy

Always spank your sons on the bre bottom. I syggest using your hand otk to age 10 and thereafter the cane with the boy bending over the back of a chair, legs apart. For all punishments I remove the boy’s clothes completely whilst he faces me. Finish with a few minutes corner time.

Jul 19, 2011 Don’t do it!
by: Magnus

You are so wrong! Have you never seen “Fanny and Alexander” by Ingmar Bergman? The boys will HATE you! Don’t spank the boys.

Jul 15, 2011 Another step Dad
by: Anonymous

Nude spanking is the answer. I recommend that the lads are also made to pull back their foreskins, to truly make them vulnerable and to add to their humilatian.

Spank them lovingly but painfully.

Another step dad of four teen lads who are aged 7, 9, 12 and 16.

Jun 02, 2011 Spank The Boys
by: Anonymous

I recommend that when any of the boys misbehaves that you spank him with a wooden paddle or a leather strap. Bare bottom is best to make the spanking properly memorable and painful. Also so that you can see the condition of the boy’s bare bottom as it is being soundly spanked. I would definitely not add humiliation y spanking in front of females, but spanking them in front of each other is okay. As far as proper spanking position, I would suggest either over your knee or have the boy bend over the bed.

Apr 12, 2011 There are better ways
by: Anonymous

I can’t believe what I am reading!? How does this shaming them while beating their bare bottoms help teach them to make the right choices when you are NOT in sight. I don’t understand how this is encouraged! Beat them and shame them? That is not giving them the life skills to make better choices. THis is not a consequence, this is lazy parenting enforcing hate and encouraging hateful behavior towards others later in their life! What is wrong with you people. Their are better ways that doesn’t have to do with humiliating your child to the point of resentment, especially if YOU are not their father but a step parent. If you really want to change their behaviour, you will seek out better ways that will promote a confident child who will know how to make good choices even without your frightful presence. Think people think! Your ideas are absurd because it has been proven that humiliating a child can backfire and have worse outcomes! That is not how to get your child’s respect, you will just create major resentment that will build up over time. Please reconsider and if you really love your children, you will work hard to find a better way, a positive way, a lasting way, to discipline your children. They deserve the best from you!

Mar 01, 2011 spanking stepsons
by: Anonymous

YES! Spank them, and a spanking has to be hard enough to insure they know you mean it! I use a rubber paddle, it is about 6″ with a handle that makes the licks cover every inch of my Dudes behinds. Make the boys remove their own jeans and underpants, spank them bare! If only one is getting it, let the 2 others see him spanked, it will give them something to worry about, and humiliate the one being spanked with his bros watching.
Make sure that they are crying real tears, from real pain, not faking it! I spank with the boy across my lap, pinning his right arm for the duration of the spanking so he can’t put his hand back to try and shield his behind, and scissor his legs so he can’t kick or squirm.
The number of swats is not predetermined, I decide if he’s had enough, when each cheek is beet red, and the sobbing and crying shows me redemption, the spanking ends! It has to be painful, and you need to follow up when they misbehave with another spanking.

I assume these Dudes have not been spanked, you will just have a longer time to breal their strong wills, but spanking them is the correct way to go. Lot’s of luck!

Feb 21, 2011 spanking stepsons
by: Anonymous

I have 3 sons, similar ages, and spank them. You can use a paddle, I prefer my belt-and I give up to 30 strokes acrsoo their bare buttcheks! If you want to make sure it is also humiliating, let the uspanke bros watch the 1 being spanked! Theywill now know wht they can expect! Yes, you will see improvement n behavior!

Jan 29, 2011 Paddle is Fine for all
by: Anonymous

Use the paddle on all three. Make them each take down pants and underwear. Having no clothes will shame them and make the punishment more memorable and make it more difficult to run away. Also you can see how red you make them and dont spank them too much. Spanking to tears is only real effective way. Spank them hard and rapidly, being sure to hold them firmly acorss their laps. After ten pops or so they should be crying. then you can slow down and spank them a little more methodically, lecturing them on what they did wrong. Once they are crying you wont need to spank as fast or as hard, but those spanks will drive the point home. Good luck.

Nov 04, 2010 Paddle Their Bare Bottoms
by: Billy

Paddle their bare bottoms across your knee, and have their mother watch them get spanked. That extra element of shaming should be a help in curbing their naughtiness. And make sure their bums are nice and warm and rosy red before you let them up.

Jul 30, 2010 spanking stepsons
by: Anonymous

you should spank all three of your stepsons the same way. otk bare bottom and with paddle. you should give at least 15 to 20 swats to your oldest and 10 to 15 to your two youngest.