Should an 11 year old boy visit a topless beach?

I appreciate any insight you can offer. I grew up in a more “restrictive” home than my husband. We went to the Riviera on our honey moon and I actually enjoyed the top freedom.

We are now both nude sleepers as are our 15 y/o daughter and 11 y/o son (Todd). There is “casual” nudity in the home. For the past five years due to economic factors we have lived frugally (no vactions, few outings, bag lunches, no a/c, no vending machine purchases, etc). I think the “no a/c” has lead to increased casual nudity during the hot/humid summers.

The mother of a good friend of our son has invited Todd to join them for two weeks in Florida this summer (Disney, South Beach, etc). A 14 y/o girl cousin from Germany will be joining them. This family has a son our Todd’s age and a 13 y/o daughter. The mother thought the boys would have each other and the girls would have each other – and perhaps they would do somethings together.

My inquiry centers on the fact that part of the time will be spent at South Beach (topless) since top freedom is something the mother and daughter enjoy and certainly the cousin from Germany. Todd does not know about the invitation since the mother wanted us to know the “conditions”.

We feel very safe and very comfortable with this family. We are quite sure Todd would love to go. My husband and I have discussed this and we feel it would be okay given the family circumstances and the fact that Todd has been raised in a “casual nudity” family.


We just don’t want to do anything to “harm” our son, but believe this is a wonderful opportunity (especially since we haven’t been able to go on vacation as a family).

Thank you, Katie

Comments for
Should an 11 year old boy visit a topless beach?

Feb 24, 2013 Perfectly fine 
by: Anonymous

It’s not about sex I see how it would be bad if it was but it’s not it’s just a bunch of people shirtless whats the big deal

Hope this helps :)
Sincerely,Anonymous


Feb 23, 2013 Why not?
by: Anonymous

Yess he should be able to discover what the other gender is like and it’s not like he hasn’t seen breasts (boobs) before :)


Jun 07, 2012 topless bathing
by: sarah

i took my middle son to greece on a holiday to celebrate him leavign school
I knew the beaches were topless and i staretd to sunbathe topless at home so i would get used to the sun etc and so he wouldnt be embaresed by my being topless as i wasnt going to be in full suit when others were topless
he got used to it eventually at home, when there he didnt really notice my boobs at all
it is all natural
he should enjoy himself


Apr 17, 2012 How They Are Raised
by: Anonymous

Every family is different and it depends on what kind of an environment a son/daughter are raised in. If a son for example, has never ssen a family member naked, or been to a nude beach before, he might have an errection most of the time. If it is a step son and daughter together naked, they might get aroused. You might be surprised to find a naked fifteen year old and a seventeen year old in bed together having sex because they got aroused. A father or mother, or both might witness this situation. They might become aroused and start having sex in the open. The children might then start having sex in the open. Before you know it, the parents are becoming attracted to their children. Then one day the father starts having sex with the daughter and the mother starts having sex with the son. They enjoy their family time together.


Apr 17, 2012 Nudity is good
by: Ed

Why not? Especially sincce you practice nudity at home. He won’t see anything he hasn’t allready seen. It should seem quite natural.
Children brought up in a nudist environment have a much healthier outlook regarding our bodies and respect for other people.


Dec 21, 2011 Not a good idea
by: Belamby

Children today are already so desensitised to proper sexuality, that taking them to a topless beach will not help a pre-puberty boy. Often people go to such places to flaunt their female attributes and acquire sunburn at the same time.
In a normal home situation, boys naturally will note the female breast and appreciate its wonderful function such as female shape and nourishing of infants,rather than as a part of the anatomy to be gawked at.


Oct 21, 2011 topless
by: Anonymous

I don t consider the girls boobs a sex organ,,I think that boys and girls could wear the same style bathing suit at the pool or beach and everyone would get used to it. when I see a naked 10 year old girl I say that she has nothing to look at,, I do not understand why all women don t shave their bottom,,the doctor on T V said that it is better hygiene,,and that she can wipe herself better,,besides its prettier that way,,


Oct 17, 2011 Good for everyone
by: Anonymous

We are born to be free. And to free yourself with the body you got for life. Make you respect you and the others as they are.


Sep 29, 2011 to late to hide the naked truth
by: common sense

sense he has already seen everything and you trust this family let him go


Sep 18, 2011 bad parenting
by: Anonymous

no i do not want to be anoyed by a peptom


Sep 13, 2011 Good Body image starts at birth….
by: Anonymous

Good body image starts at birth and how we are raised from that point on.When children are raised in a home that openly embraces nudity as a part of daily life, children carry that throughout their lives. Home nudity, going from the shower to the bedroom, nude swimming in the back yard with family and other open minded friends,sneaking down to the kitchen for a midnight snack in the nude all are freeing experiences that should be considered the norm rather than the old victorian guilt mongers preaching the imagined evils of nudity. Our children were raised with an open mind toward nudity and all have a really good self image that they will carry on with their families.


Sep 06, 2011 Breasts are not frightening
by: Anonymous

Why not. Its not as though he has not seen things like BREASTS before. I dont see why it should be a problem. My daughters have seen me naked for years. They are now 21 and 25. It hasn,t made them worse children


Sep 01, 2011 Yes
by: Yes,No,Maybe

I have a felling he might like what he sees! lol


Jul 04, 2011 Sexist
by: Anonymous

You attitude is sexist, and more harmful to your son then any bare breast. The question is; should your son be around you?


Jun 30, 2011 What is more dangerous?
by: Anonymous

Ask yourselves: what could possibly happen if your sons and daughters see a naked body live – as opposed to seeing someone nude on the internet or in a porn mag? Man was born naked. The bible/church has oppressed man. As soon as someone gets naked or is shown nude (especially children) people complain. But hardly anyone complains about wars and that people get killed – all the weapons out there, car accidents, domestic violence etc. Also, remember we are sexual beings and I am pretty sure children growing up in a nude environment get a healthier life…


Apr 22, 2011 I Support.
by: Jon

I find it rather sad that anyone is still shocked, disgusted or anything of the like by someone going topless or even breast feeding here in the U.S. What even happened to equality D.C tell me why a guy can go with out a shirt and a woman can’t, it is gender discrimination plain and simple.


Mar 09, 2011 Glad he got to go
by: Anonymous

Given the social environment – I’m not surprised you had questions. People think my family is weird because we were allowed to skinny dip. My sister and brother and I saw each other naked plenty – slept naked – sometimes in the same bed – oh my! lol My wife and I have two now who are allowed to skinny dip, sleep naked – I think it creates a healthy respect and takes away the “naughty” factor. Altho, there is always a hint of naughty from the outside world which is kind of fun actually. But I find my kids arent nearly so infatuated with sex as some of their “textile” friends. No one thinks twice about their cat or dog being unclothed – but for humans somehow its a crime. Now talk about wierd!


Mar 08, 2011 I don understand the problem
by: Angela

I am mother f a 11 year boy and a 17 girl. Me and my daughter always go topless as everybody in Spain. I cannot see any problem, my son is used to seing us and al the women topless.


Feb 03, 2011 Why Not?
by: Anonymous

I have a 10 year old daughter and an 11 year old step son. We live in the USA where attitudes twoard nudity are intolerable. Each summer we visit Cap d’Agde in France. This is basically a nude city and nude beach. Anyway, my kids love spending their holidays at Cap d’Agde. They make lots of good friends and have a blast. They are both reaching that age where their body awareness is increasing and they have confided in me they love to see other children their age naked. They have a lot of fun and enjoy having their friends come over to the villa to play video games and watch movies when they aren’t hanging out on the beach or at the pool. It is something to see a room full of naked kids playing games and having a blast!


Nov 28, 2010 topless
by: Michele Italy

I have two sons (15 and 13), they0re uses to seeing their mother topless at the beach, I think there shouldn’be any problems


Nov 21, 2010 Father votes YES
by: Anonymous

As a dad of a 13 y/o girl and a 15 y/o boy that used to live in South Florida, I would say YES for sure.

I would have NO problem with my daughter going topless at a topless public beach and her brother would have no problem around his sister being topless, he used to see his mother topless for years


Apr 01, 2010 Of course!
by: Bob

Sure, as long as he doesn’t do anything wrong, it should be fine.


Feb 13, 2010 YES
by: Anonymous

Sure he has to know whats out in the world sooner or later and it should be sooner


Nov 18, 2009 It’s not about sex
by: Anonymous

Our children see nudity on TV, although I have no TV, I do watch movies. When seen on tv or on a screen, it is seen as sexual.
I am divided now, because I allowed my son to visit a nude beach. I was with him althoughI didn’t get naked….I let him experience the way it felt. My ex husband found out,because my son told him…I think my son liked it, but then later was made to feel there was something inherently wrong with it.
My therapist made a judgement on it and compared it to if I had been brought to a nude beach by my father at aged 13. I still believe there is a difference there(with that psychological reasoning). My son becamme mentally ill that summer and the guilt I felt was tremendous.
I stopped seeing the therapist because he just wouldn’t let up. After all, she had been a nun for 25 years, she left that position, and is now married.
I read a book on the family bed when I was still married and breast feeding. I used to have to go away on the weekends for hese high end craft shows and my babywould go to my parents. The seperation was tremendous, and one time i came home, he was sick and I was still breast feeding, I kept him in my bed, and he never left, as my husband was a night shifter, I couldn’t see a reason to seperate my son from me.
We divorced , and the need to sleep together was more evident when he would come to visit. He had missed me so much, he was afraid to be alone.
The divorce was cruel, I was forced to leave the home, and I moved 3 hours away, after becoming unwelcomed in my parents’ home.
The whole point to my telling this long drawn out story is that there had always been an innocent closeness between my son and me his mom. People around us my ex, my parents, ripped us apart.
Never was there any kind of sexual thing between my son and me. He’s always had his own room. He was always allowed as much privacy as he needed…
People with strong religous beliefs made us feel bad. Sinners…I wanted to show my son that nudity is not about sex, but a way of life especially on the beach in the sun. Some people make it aout sex…it’s all how it is percieved.
I have become more conservative and less open about my nudity and litterally afraid to shed my clothes because of the incident w/ my son.
I believe in the right supportiv environment, nudity for children and adolecents is actually good for them.


Nov 17, 2009 Get another therapist
by: Mom of 2 teens

To the woman whose therapist was angry about this. Have you read all of these comments? I’ve been to many nude and topless beaches and there have always been boys your son’s age around. In Europe as you can see this isn’t even an issue. Either set your therapist straight or get a new one. She has a few hangups.


Sep 24, 2009 Still not sure….
by: Anonymous

My son is 13, and was curious abut a nude beach I go to…o I gradully introduced him to it, and e seem to really enjoy the freedom of being naked for a short duration of time. I did not get unclothd but speaking to my therapist today about it, she was very, very upset that I had done that(brought him there to that beach).
I only wanted him to experience the freedom.
I’ve been feeling like the mother from hell ever since talking to her today. She was very judgemental and said thatif his father, my ex husband, wanted to declare me an unfit mom, that that piece of information would do it.
I feel just terrible…


Sep 22, 2008 no big deal
by: Sue

I am the mom of 2 kids (boy 15 and girl 17) and have visited relatives in Europe and we have all gone to the beach topless and it was quite educational for our family – no big deal.


Jul 23, 2008 Follow-up
by: Katie

I wrote:

“The mother of a good friend of our son has invited Todd to join them for two weeks in Florida this summer (Disney, South Beach, etc). A 14 y/o girl cousin from Germany will be joining them. This family has a son our Todd’s age and a 13 y/o daughter. The mother thought the boys would have each other and the girls would have each other – and perhaps they would do somethings together.

My inquiry centers on the fact that part of the time will be spent at South Beach (topless) since top freedom is something the mother and daughter enjoy and certainly the cousin from Germany.”

Well to bring you all full cycle Todd just got back home a few days ago after having a WONDERFUL time in Florida with his friends. Although I do think Todd was a “bit taken” by their German cousin. We told him no pictures of breasts. Thanks again for your comments and support. We believe we made the right decision.


Apr 15, 2008 Topfreedom
by: Kaitline

We have one son who is now 14. We travel to Europe once every year. Our son had been to topfree beaches since he was 2. We have discussed the differences between many American beaches and many beaches in Europe with him. He has always seemed very comfortable, I say if he is comfortable let him go and enjoy (maybe when things change and you can vacation you might try a topfree beach as a family – its great). I will try to attach a pix of him in Marseilles when he was 11. He is the one sitting on the edge of the surf.

http://img528.imageshack.us/my.php?image=19112428222a5376363ftgg9.jpg


Apr 15, 2008 Topfreedom
by: Kaitlin

We only have one son and travel once a year to Europe. Our son, now 14, has been to topfree beaches since he was old enough to go to the beach. We have discussed the differences between many American beaches and many European beaches. He is very comfortable in the topfree environment. Will try to include a pix of him at age 11 (your son’s age) while we were in Marseille. He is the boy sitting on the edge of the surf.

http://img528.imageshack.us/my.php?image=19112428222a5376363ftgg9.jpg


Mar 25, 2008 Yes!
by: Brenda

I grew up in the 70 and 80’s on a farmette. We had five acres and grew fruits and vegetables for our family. I was one of 8 kids. Six boys and me, child # 2 and my sister # 7. I guess you can understand when I say we had little privacy. We each had a pair of pjs – that we were not to wear, but were to be kept “just in case”. So we slept in various ways – underwear, or tee shirts or often in the hot weather nude. With six brothers my sister and I certainly knew what boys looked like – at all ages and they knew what girls looked like.

We would work “the farm” for a few hours each day in the summer and then off to the outdoor shower with no door and then right into the pool for hours of fun. We swam nude and thought nothing of it. Isn’t that the way every family swam? After all keeping up with laundry for the 10 of us was enough without complicating it with bathing suits. I went barefoot and braless most of the summer, except on Sundays. I still hate to wear a bra. I was often topless with my brothers as were worked on “the farm” or just played many hours of soccer and basketball topfree. We had great tans with little or no tans lines and we didn’t even try. I thought if my brothers didn’t have to wear a shirt why did I? Then along came my little sister who was seven years younger and as I entered puberty she went around without a top and so did I.

I have said all of that to say that my brothers and I were comfortable with me and my sister being topless. So if you son is comfortable why not let him go, sounds like he would appreciate the vacation. I think it is healthy.


Mar 24, 2008 Young daughter
by: Anonymous

My husband and I have one daughter. Every three year since she was 4 we have taken her to Disney and then driven over to the East Coast of FL to visit relatives and then spend a few days at SouthBeach. I love being topless (both sunning and swimming are so much better – not quite ready for being nude). We never felt the need to give our daughter a top when at South Beach and she never seemed to mind or notice. As she got older we thought perhaps at perhaps 7 or 10 she might want a top. I always brought one along, but never mentioned it. Surely we thought at 13as she was budding she would want a top and so we gave her the option – she choose topless. Then last year when we were there she was 16 and nicely developed and again she opted for topfree. I think given the choose and right environment many children would prefer to be topfee. I discussed your query with my husband and wondered if we had a boy what we would have done – and we came to the conclusion the same thing we did with our daughter. We hope your son enjoys his entire vacation.


Mar 24, 2008 Topfreedom!
by: Kelly

Kelly – I live in the Netherlands and am a mom with three boys (13, 11 and 10) and the beaches here as in most of Europe you will find are topfree – so my boys are very comfortable with it including seeing their mom…it is the way things are here- — we are not afraid of human breasts and I think you will find that we have a healthier outlook and alot less curiosity about the human body. While I know you live in the USA I think if your son is comfrotable and with people you trust I would let him do what he chooses in this matter.


Mar 11, 2008 My Experience
by: Kathi

Katie,

I have boys now 13 y/o and 15 y/o and we have taken them to many topfree beaches in Europe since they were toddlers. I just love the topfreedom. They didn’t wear bathing suits until they were 7 or 8 – no need. We have been to SB several times and the boys take it all in stride…I think boys this age are more “turned on” by bikinis then by monokinis. If you and your husband are comfortable with this family – then lay it out for your son and see what he says (I can only guess). After all if you nursed him is has seen breast from day one…their is nothing wrong with a women’s breast. Hope he can go and enjoy!!