I have a 4-year-old son. His mom abandoned him when he was one and for the past two years has seen him only on the weekends. About 6 months ago, when she had him, she filed custody papers, and we had no court ordered custody. Unable to afford a lawyer, I somehow defaulted and the judge granted her sole physical and legal custody. I am now trying to get the default overturned. Our son lived with me and his grandpa, my dad, his whole life. The mom has kept us seperated out of fear I would take him and run. He misses his dad and grandpa and wants to come home. I have tried to explain to her that her actions are hurting him and will probably cause emotional problems for him. She doesn't care or doesn't get it or whatever. I am looking for something she can read that will explain to her that this little guy is someday going to resent her for what she's doing. I don't want her cruel ways to rub off on him. Any suggestions?
Comments for
mom won't allow 4-year-old boy time with dad
Hi there. What a sad situation this is. The courts really need to start showing a little bit of leniency to those who cannot afford attorneys. As it is now, they basically treat the parent without the attorney like some sort of dead beat. My husband has just gone through something similar to the point that the attorney that we ended up HAVING to retain has suggested that we file against the judge and the attorney for his ex. We have the transcripts from the hearing as well as the judge signing orders that had not even been received and gone over by my husband and did not have the proper follow through by the attorney!!! At any rate, none of that will help your son, sorry I get a little bit passionate about this topic. I will tell you one thing that might help, my husband to this day resents his mother for basically doing the same thing. Keeping him from his father when his father had custody and then badmouthing his father to him. He hates her. Also, when your son is of an age to see the reality of really happened, he will blame her. Yet the problem is now. He might see the "truth" later, but he will already have severe emotional issues and difficulties with commitment, fear of abandonment, etc. Does she really want to cause all of that for him? She might be able to get away with blaming you now, but what is she going to do when he realizes later that using him as a pawn in a sick game to get back at you was more important to her than his happiness? Good luck! Keep us posted.
