I am a well educated person raised in loving, stable home. I was unprepared for difficulties I faced with several of my children. They exhibited severe tantrums, uncontrolled yelling, hitting. there were many characteristics that made me wonder about various psychological disorders. I was at my wits end after being bitten, hit, lied about, etc and was having zero results. Now my home is peaceful and ordered, and all the kids are happy as well. I was amazed how quickly I was able to make the program work.
The key for me is not so much discussing things after they happen and helping learn lessons (though I do try to do this too). The key for me has been constantly reminding them of the priveleges they like (which previously I had looked upon as not that big of deals) and going over with them the things they like, refocusing them on those things, then taking them back hard to what their behavior is about to cost them when they get their priveleges taken away. "your so close, don't blow it now." "don't do it". I sound like a clone of the CD audios of lehman (and some of my kids are even repeating some of the phrases, have kidding, but also just because they like the way it sounds).
Before I never could get my daughter to focus on how her actions were going to affect her, or get her to stop herself, stop because of upcoming punishment etc - now she is able to focus on something else quite quickly! (the things she likes) realize she is about to lose them, and then quickly change her behavior. in addition the amount of trouble incidents, and especially tantrums have dribbled down to very few. life is great! all the kids are helping clean up. i can't express enough how much this program has helped me in parenting and the relief it has given my spirit. thanks much, Frank Burch
