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The power
of a successful homeschool journey cannot be over
emphasized. Every parent who home schools wants
to enjoy the adventure, grow close to their children
and have well rounded children at the end of it.
But moms hold the power to sabotage their own homeschools
and often they do not even know they are doing it.
Here are some warnings (and remedies) for homeschooling
parents so that you are do not become one of them.
Warning
#1 - You have no systems in place
How do
you know this is happening? You cannot find your
school books, the children cannot find their pens
and pencils, your laundry is piling up and you cupboards
and fridge are empty.
Solution
- Take one afternoon on the weekend to plan your
meals, do your grocery shopping, get your books
ready for the next week and get your children to
make sure their desks and pencil boxes are ready
for Monday. Set up a laundry system in your home
to make sure that your family has clean clothing
and linens.
Warning
#2 - Your children take forever to do their work
Some
children are slow workers, but many are dawdlers.
If your junior grade children are taking more than
a 3 hours to do their work or your high schooler
more than 6 hours then chances are that they are
wasting time.
Solution
- Make sure that you are giving your children short
lessons so that dawdling is discouraged. Ensure
that you alternate a hard lesson for a easier lesson.
Take the time to train your children in the habit
of attention so that they learn the importance of
giving something their full attention and completing
work in a timely fashion.
Warning
#3 - Your children spend more time on school work
than life
If your
children are spending more than a third of their
day in formal academic pursuits, it is a sure fire
way of producing burnout in mom and child.
Solution
- Raymond and Dorothy Moore, grandparents of the
homeschooling movement, make use of a head, heart
and hand principle. They said that a child¡¯s day
should be balanced equally between these three occupations.
Head refers to academic pursuits; Hand refers to
work in and around the home like chores and entrepreneurial
activities and Heart refers to spiritual and moral
training a parent should impart.
Warning
#4 - Your children are allowed unlimited daily doses
of TV and computer
Children
should not watch TV or work on the computer everyday.
It is an unhealthy situation as the stimulus that
the brain receives from these two activities causes
a dumbing down process where the child forgets how
to entertain themselves, play out imaginary games
and be productively and creatively busy - to mention
just a few negatives.
Solution
- Make a list of all the productive pursuits that
your child can do and put to when they nag and ask
for TV or their computer games. Ensure that you
draw them alongside you in your day to day activities
- and set the example yourself!
Warning
#5 - Mom does not ensure that she is sufficiently
rested
When
a mom is tired, burnt out and running from play-dates
to sports all afternoon and never takes a moment
for a quiet cup of tea and a book, she is bound
to be tense and overwrought. When mom has nothing
left, she cannot give to her children and be a healing
presence in her home.
Solution
- Mom needs to set aside small moments in her day
to take a breather. This can be a chapter of a good
book, a walk around the garden, a cup of tea - on
her own. It could also mean getting to bed earlier
so that she can rise before her family with a small
head start on her day. Mom needs to take time out
monthly as well, so that she can set her hand to
a craft or hobby where she can take off the ¡°homeschooling
mom hat.¡±
Warning
#6 - The homeschooling parents talk of nothing but
their children
Does
it seem like whenever mom and dad go out or have
a moment together, all they talk about is homeschooling
and parenting? While there is time for that, it
is also very important that they take time to remember
that their relationship ranks right up there in
importance.
Solution
- Make a pact that you will do something special
together, weekly or monthly, where you do not talk
about homeschooling, parenting or household matters.
Just enjoy being together.
Warning
#7 - Parents control their children rather than
build relationship with their children
This
is a tough one¡ isn't it? We want the best for
our children; we want them to be all they were created
to be and to achieve much in their lives. But often
a parent will go overboard and forget that the reason
they are raising children is so that they can be
strong valuable members of a community.
Solution
- Like a young sapling tree, protect your children
as they need it. Train them in moral and spiritual
guidelines as you take hold of those truths as well.
As they grow and show maturity in certain areas,
permit them to begin making their own decisions
within the realm of what is permissible to your
boundaries as a family unit.
Warning
#8 - A homeschooling mom who spend too much time
feeding on other lives
I left
this for last because this one point can be the
single most damaging thing that can happen to any
homeschool. When a mom is always comparing herself
and her children to what the next person is doing,
what the other children have achieved, the projects
that they are doing, instead of getting on and living
her life with her children, she is bound to become
frustrated and defeated.
Solution
- Accept the season that your family is in - perhaps
you have just had a baby and an in-depth unit study
will sent your teetering over the edge! Perhaps
your children have special needs and are not able
to concentrate for long. Whatever the reason¡ accept
the season. Also remember that each home and family
is unique and your family has a specific flavor
to it. When you try and bring in another family¡¯s
culture to your own, you dilute the beauty of your
family.
About
The Author:
Wendy
Young is the homeschooling mom to 4 children aged
7 ¨C 14 years. They have always been at home. She
has been married for 19 years. Wendy¡¯s website,
Homeschool-Curriculum-For-Life, is dedicated
to helping moms choose curriculum, get organized,
and enjoy the homeschool journey by equipping them
as their roles as wives, women, and moms.
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